prayer poetic: learning hope

Staring down the barrel of a faithless generation, 

seemingly this deadly bully's next prey

Feeling so alone and heavily burdened, 
as though I had thrown my personal forgiveness away

The intensity of this pain unexplained, 
lost in the hollow, dark shadows of my heart

Somehow destined for more than I know, 
a willing servant with no idea where to start

Walking under the brass sky of failure, 
leaving what I thought I knew

Believing I once had a dream to serve others and now, 
not knowing what to do

Internally torn apart, the weight of a heart completely made of stone, 
for my own faithlessness, tell me how do I atone?

The fear of failure ever gripping, slender fingers on my dream, 
the divine vision hidden in my heart that blinded I cannot see

Worn thin by the circumstances of life, the place of rest unfound, 
able to see the wound of depression in the darkest of chains bound

Scars from the rejection injection not knowing who I am, 
lost under this brass sky of failure, I no longer think I can

Longing for a new day and wondering if hope is gone, 
remembering the sound of joy but off-key is my heart's song,

The damnation of cold stagnation, no life, movement gone; 
How can I get out of this and where did I go wrong?

O Lord I need your life, your breath, your fruit unto me bring

Lest I walk in coldest bitterness in varying degrees

I don't want to forget your mercy and love found faithfully true

My fortitude debilitated I simply don't know what to do.

I call out to you in desperation, fervent prayers in anticipation

O Lord I need your strength, direction; teach me to receive love

I want to know You intimately, in a new way I know not of

Take me into your shadow and free my heart these chains

Teach me to walk under open heavens, giving off Your glory's rays

Bound to you alone, finding joy and peace, teach me to worship You and to fight upon my knees

Take me on this journey with You, holding my frail hand

Breathe Your precious breath into me that I may love again

Make straight the path before me that I may walk on safest ground

no matter what the storm I'm facing, in You I won't be knocked down

Hide me in the shadow of your wings, reveal to me ancient secret things

The stories of Your heart and love and why You made us so

Teach me how to fear You, that in You I may grow

Willingly I ran from You, thinking I knew it all

That You too would not receive me, that between us was a wall

Yet what You've done upon that cross was not trivial or small

Your rising from stone sleeping chambers brought to my life a call

Fan into my spirit a passion ever new, thank You Lord for victory, desires that come from You

I've labored long in this dark place, experienced the low of shame

But now Your Love breaks through to touch me, I cannot remain the same

Though frightened by the work unknown, I know it must be true

There is a dream established for me, what You've given me to do

I lift up my eyes to see You and You wipe my tears away

You speak to me so gently in Your perfect Fatherly way

I have no more excuses and now I have this chance

You fold me in Your faithful arms and now begins the dance

This journey is one of greatness and fitness for the test

But You are here to guide me and lead me to Your very best

The nations have not seen nor any peoples heard

What will shift and be reborn because You've given me Your Word.