believe

I believe...
In the face of pain, contradiction and things seemingly falling apart, I believe that the greatest peace I have ever known is upon me. Today I am tired and emotionally drained but I believe that I am about to be restored, refreshed, renewed and rebuilt in a way that may be surprising to others. I choose to believe today because I know Him whom holds my world.

I believe that now is the time for a difference and to truly move beyond my past. I know what's been but I am excited to see what will be. I believe that every need already has the necessary provision and that I am about to experience a better education than any number of years at the most prestigious university could buy. I believe that I will see the fruit of what I've learned over recent years manifest in the form of uncommon wisdom when it is tempered with prayer and seeking His face.

I believe that my faith has already been strengthened and will only continue to grow. I believe this timing is not a coincidence. I believe it's time to become more acquainted with my Lord, love my family, serve with my whole heart and have fun living. I believe it's time to repent and be transformed by the renewing of my mind. I believe I am free and I believe in that I am available to change the world. I truly believe.

square peg

I've heard it said that you should save for a rainy day. I wish I could tell you I had the perfect emergency fund stashed away and that I was prepared financially for any sudden changes in life. Alas, I cannot say that and it be true. However, today I sit here and I can tell you that on Monday, it rained in my life. I cannot go into much detail at the moment but there will be a significant change in my life soon.

I realized something today and I wanted to capture it in words. I may not have a financial overflow or all the wisdom and training in life to fill this hole but I realized, thanks be to God that in Him I have been filled with a knowing that keeps me from feeling as though there is a hole in me, that there is something lacking or inherently faulty. I'm not defective. Additionally I realized, and maybe accepted is the accurate term, that I was created with a specific purpose to fill a hole. There is a perfect place for me and this is the time for it. One of my favorite passages of Scripture is Acts 17:24-28. Verse 26 really hits me:


26 From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live.

Many times in my life I have felt out of place as though I were not in the "exact place" or time. I have allowed that to make me feel less than and as though I was not needed or important. I have felt secondary, as though I was just kind of here, existing, not adding much value. That kind of self-loathing can be felt and my self-rejection has lead to others rejecting me.

Recently, I have felt a stirring within me that is leading me to change. I can no longer allow this defeated mentality to drown me in its downpour. I know that I have so much to give. I long to serve and help others see their own value and find the place where they "fit." I want to draw the greatness out of them so that they can make an impact on this world!

This week I decided that if I'm a square peg that means there is a square opening somewhere waiting for me to fill it and again this is the time for it. I'm not just going to sit around and keep letting life happen to me. God has prepared me, anointed me and placed me here at this exact place and time. In His kingdom there are places for square pegs to fit. And as Mordecai said to Esther, "And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" (Esther 4:14b)

Look out Aisha Nichole is about to happen to life!

when i grow up

I am a grown up. *sigh* I am a Spirit-filled believer in the God of the Bible. I am one of the most powerful forces on this earth. However, I do not live as though this is true. This must change NOW. When I grow up, which is NOW, I am going to be a writer. Not just any writer, what I will produce will be anointed from the heavens to help people see the light of His glory. I will also speak, declaring His revelations to me to the world, yes to the nations. But most exciting, I will be serving and in that place of serving I will have the favor and influence that He always intended. I will be a part of a dynamic team! At the moment it may seem dark and chaotic but He is the Light radiating into my present and guiding me to my future.

He gave me a promise when I was only 17 that the legacy of my family and the legacy of many would change with me. I remember how I felt in that moment, the excitement, the gratitude, the joy. But along the track of life, I began to consider myself unworthy of accepting such a mantle and made many excuses and due to past failures and present pressures feel like giving up and running away. But NOW, I don't have time for that. I do not know why He chose me and at the end of the day I am just grateful that He did. I know that reading here is a bit like watching an intense tennis match, back and forth and back and forth but NOW I have to change, shift perspective. I am perfectly capable of success, no matter where this journey started and what station the train is currently in, it is moving along the track ever closer to destiny.

shift gears: thrive

Did I not declare that I would bring change?

How many times have I told you that waiting is not what it seems to you?

I do My work while you are asleep

I shift and rearrange so you won’t taste defeat

I made you victorious, My beloved one

Your challengers were destroyed long ago by My Son

Though time may seem short, My plan’s already begun

I’ll tell you again, you’ve already won!

Walk as I tell you and speak My decrees,

The quieter you live the more of Me they will see

Everything you need, I already have

Come follow Me, your Ever Loving Dad

I will never give up, just give in to Me

Surrender in peace, I Am all that you need

I’ve given you this story, I brought it to life

You my beautiful one are now fully alive

I’ve place My Spirit in you, anointed you for the task

Do you need anything of Me? The key is to ask

I’ve set you up to prepare My Son’s bride

Speak to the nations, reconcile and revive!

Worry no more for I send you this day

Command every mountain to move out of your way

I Am truly with you, not only by your side

I flow from within you

It’s with My love that you Thrive!

originally written Nov 26 2011

dream again

It is time to dream again! I have planted seeds within you that are coming up and it is closer to time for the harvest. Yes that impossible dream that no knows but Me, I put it there. I am not calling you to something I have not equipped you for. I do not send the inexperienced into battle. Your time with Me has been your basic training. The struggles in your life have been the training ground, the exercise of your faith there has been your preparation to go in and take the mountain before you now. As my servant Caleb, you can go confidently in Me, knowing that victory is assured.

Open your ears and close your eyes that you may see what I have planted in you. Each of you has a mission for now and the seeds of the future are being watered, tended and are growing. At the right time, they will break the surface and bloom into what they need to be. Each blossom that buds must return to the ground to multiply, keep close to me, the place your heart was meant to be and watch Me. I will accomplish my dream and it will be with you.